Confusion
This week, mercury retrograde began. In Astrology, mercury rules communication, commerce, technology, travel and our minds. Although everyone is affected to some extent, mercury retrograde is especially annoying for Virgos and Geminis, whether it’s their sun sign, moon sign or ascendant. During mercury retrograde we tend to experience delays, changes in the agenda, misunderstandings and confusion. It is also a time to slow down from the speed of our lives, reassess our decisions and review our actions. Sometimes we create unnecessary confusion; some others, our phones just break down or people from our past come back for a reason.
The hero’s journey
Naturally, someone asked me this week about a loved one who passed away. And as this question crossed my mind, I needed time to review and reassess all that I had lived. It’s hard to put into words the memories surrounding that kind of loss, but mercury’s energy was there to put things into perspective. Some time ago, I wrote a poem called Grief, in which I mentioned Mordor. Perhaps the analogy of Mordor from The Lord of the Rings can offer some insight. When a loved one dies, it creates a void that you can never truly fill. I don’t think I could have understood it before it happened to me. People often say: “I’m sorry for your loss.” And without sounding arrogant, if they haven’t experienced the death of someone truly close, they probably have no idea what it’s really like. I didn’t, until it happened to me.
This void is an overwhelming sense of emptiness and darkness, as if the world suddenly turned its lights off. That’s why I reference Mordor. It feels like a poisoned path through fear and sorrow, forcing you to confront your deepest pain, forcing you to hide and make attemps to survive. It becomes one of the most damaging experiences of our lifetime. It took me more than a year after the loss to fill that void and heal that emptiness. But just like Frodo and Harry Potter, the hero’s journey ends in redemption and peace. I also met people who were shortly in my life, but didn’t really understand. To be honest, I don’t blame them; most of them didn’t know how to be there, perhaps they couldn’t understand or couldn’t care about my pain. Interestingly, some people from my past even left my life, while I became immersed in myself.
If you’re reading this, perhaps you’ve come across some of my other writings, such as the one on spiritual awakening. If you have, you’ll know that I’m a strong believer in the collective. I think I’ve repeated a few times a crucial idea that had a massive impact on my perception of the world: we are all one with the universe. Now, you might be asking yourself: How is the experience of loss connected to the oneness of the universe? It’s simple. We are all connected. The people who came into my life did so with a purpose and they left after their purpose was fulfilled. Using the word purpose might sound utilitarian, but it’s not. It’s a soul purpose.
Collective widsom
A soul purpose is hard to describe. I talk a bit about mirroring and the law of attraction in a text called deep soul transformation. A soul purpose involves healing, transformation and a process of evolution at the very core of our existence. It’s like becoming another version of yourself. You could also think of it as transforming your emotional or social intelligence. It’s about recognising that we are on a journey. And allowing yourself to fully experience whatever you are going through. It’s about finding meaning and fulfillment within yourself, so you can spread that light to the world. It’s like opening your wings and flying. It’s about discovering what makes you unique and using those qualities to make an impact.
At this point, the collective turns extremely relevant, because we mainly experience all these changes through others. In other words, we attract these “others” into our lives. They visit us with their own soul purpose. They come to show us what is missing, unhealed or needs a second thought. And in their journey, they also see parts of themselves that need healing or a second thought. This is why awareness and gratitude are so important. Without those “others” that have either caused us pain or just asked a simple question, we wouldn’t see our own pain or take a second look at the past. So yes, we are one, and I am thankful to the others as they are here to reveal my authentic self.
